Only a week to go until The Odyssey hits screens and we get to see Odysseus’ loyal pal Argos. With The Dog Stars and Heart of the Beast on their way too, Hollywood seems to be letting the dogs out. In the spirit of that, I’ll be looking at some of our furry fellas on the big (and the small) screen.
Some potential doggy spoilers here, too, so be careful. Consult the ol’ reliable doesthe dogdie website before viewing if you’re concerned.
Nolan’s pretty well-known for using code names in his scripts to avoid leaks. Some include his children’s names (Rory’s First Kiss = The Dark Knight, Flora’s Letter = Interstellar), but for his recent flick, he chose ‘Charlie’s Tale’. And Charlie’s the name of his own furry boy, with the director claiming that he ‘had to become a dog owner before I could truly understand the emotional heart of the film’ in a recent interview with Empire magazine, issue 456, to be precise. The pooch waits all those years for his masters’ return from war, and then (uh, spoiler alert, I guess, but this poem has been around for a decent number of centuries at this point) dies in a puddle of mud. RIP loyal hound. ૮ ・ﻌ・ა
Here are some other pooches below.
Seymour Butts (Futurama, Jurassic Bark)
There’s no way Futurama’s writers didn’t borrow a fair amount of Odyssean influence for this shaggy dog story. Back when Fry is in his own timeline, he has a loyal pooch who always follows him around. They sing Walkin’ on Sunshine together, and the dawg gets some tasty pizza courtesy of his master. After Fry is unexpectedly transported centuries into the future, though, he’s not there to look after his home boy. 🐕
When a fossilised version of Seymour is found, however, Fry finally has the chance to meet up with his old pal. At the last moment, however, when Professor Farnsworth notes that Seymour died ‘at the ripe old age of 15’, Fry concludes that he had a good life long after he left him at the age of 3, and that he probably forgot about him. Cue a heartbreaking flashback that rips my soul in two and still brings me close to tears when I watch it, especially since the recent death of my own dogen friend soon after his sixteenth year on this planet. Seymour hangs around the whole darn time, and never sees him again, eventually dying on the pavement. Add the fact that this pooch looks super similar to a border terrier (my dawg’s breed), which I think the creators based the guy on. Goddamn. I’m a wreck. ૮ ˘ﻌ˘ ა
Also, Seymour’s story is (supposedly) based on the story of Hachiko, a dog who had waited for his owner who died 10 years ago at the train station where they would always meet on the way home. Ahhh, stop chopping those onions.
Technically though, in one of the Futurama films, Fry manages to come back and spend that pooches’ last 12 years with him. So that’s something. ◣(´ᴥ`)◢
The Snowdog (The Snowman and the Snowdog)
This lad’s officially banned for Crimbo 2026. And perhaps the next few. Mostly because that bit with the stiff dog being helped out of the car is way too close to home with my own deceased dogen. The waterworks would just start flowing, and I can’t deal with that. The snowdog is a lovable chap, no doubt, but those opening scenes are too heart wrenching for the moment. ૮ ˙ ﻌ˙ ა
Baxter (Anchorman, Anchorman 2)
I guess technically different Baxters, because the first Baxter had died at the point of production for the second film (RIP my foggy gentleman of London town). But yeah, this guy made a huge impact with minimal screen time. He manages to eat a whole role of cheese (as his owner Ron Burgandy exalts: ‘I’m not even mad, I’m impressed’), wear some hella cute pyjamas, get kicked off a bridge by Jack Black and live to tell the tale. And he saves his master’s life more than once, first from bears and then from a shark in the second film. Good boy. ໒( ̿･ ᴥ ̿･ )ʋ
Fanny (The Hunt)
This was mostly just disturbing. Because, uh (*cough*Checkdoesthedogdie*cough), this pooch gets shot. And the reason said pooch gets shot is because the main gal tells porky pies about innocent teacher Mads Mikkelsen. And, yeah. Oof. I got big Atonement vibes from that girl telling tattle tales. Different scenarios, sure, but, nonetheless. Anyway, Fanny deserved better than that. U・ﻌ・U
Underdog (Underdog)
My memory about this particular film (and this particular dog) is pretty fuzzy, I won’t lie. But a key thing to note when you’re doing children’s films about dogs is that talking dogs (the live action kind) aren’t funny. At least I didn’t find this particular dog funny. It’s just a bit odd. Anyway, I had a good time watching this with a house member when it first came out in my newly opened in cinema in town, but the fact remains that the dawg didn’t have enough rizz. Dogs whose language is emoted with subtitles tends to be more effective (i.e. Anchorman’s Baxter). Just some, uh, paws for thought. (❍ᴥ❍ʋ)
Marley (Marley and Me)
I also can’t say this doggy flick stays in my mind a whole lot. Not in the sense of having a particularly strong canine hero. I remember it more in the sense of seeing it as a preview with a house member then getting diagnosed with cancer about a month later. Fun times. But, uh, regardless of that fact, I just didn’t think the film, or its central pooch, was that powerful. Yes, my 11-year-old self-made that astute summary. Hm. ʕっ•ᴥ•ʔっ
Scooby-Doo (Scooby-Doo)
Another one where I attended the film as a preview courtesy of a house member. Nice. Although I was a bit younger on this occasion. And a fair bit more ignorant, considering that I thought that the CGI scooby great dane was real. Sure, my dumb ass would only have been around 5 or 6, but there’s no excuse for ignorance in that area. In the ever-growing evil world of AI, you’ve gotta know how to spot those fakes. As for the actual pooch, I thought he/it was pretty entertaining. So there’s a scooby snack for ya, CGI boi. ૮ ºﻌºა
Chopper (Stand By Me)
I guess this feels more like an honourable mention, because this guy’s only in the film for a hot minute. It’s more just Gordy’s funny storytelling that builds up the myth. But when he blasts onto the scene, he sure makes an impact. He doesn’t get his target, but hey, he makes a decent effort. ꒰⌯͒•·̫•⌯͒꒱
Strays (Reggie)
I wanted to like this movie more than I did. Sure, it’s hard to go wrong when it’s Will Ferrell doing the main voice acting work, but I guess it was a bit too crude for my liking. Still, the big points it gets are because the particular breed of dog that Ferrell’s voicing is a Border Terrier. The best breed. Not that I’m biased. But it is. Objectively. Anyway, Ferrell’s quite funny, but the overall crudeness kind of brings a downer here. ૮ ⚆ﻌ⚆ა
I think Jurassic Bark just about takes the win here. Yep, that’s best in show.
🐾
I did another similar article a while ago if you fancy reading that, and just to clarify that I’ve been thinking about Argos for a while. And if you don’t fancy reading it, that’s cool too.